Tall Meets Tall
by Alias Black
Summary: Another Almighty Tallests fic! I have to say I'm not used to this...but anyway, the Tallests have a new Irken on board, a girl...who is tall...0.o guess what that means! *puts up a shield for flames*
1. Your Tall!

Author's Note: It took a lot of guts to post this for fear of being flamed to hell. But with all those ZADR, I thought this was okay. It's not even a romance, it's just this stupid thing I thought up. The tallests both like the same person, so they fight over her. It's actually going to be very humorous and not AT ALL serious. So please bear with me! _"  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim and stuff…  
  
Tall meets Tall  
  
Chapter One: Your Tall!  
  
Three pairs of feet were heard clanking on the metal floor of the Massive. Two pairs belonged to escorts, and the third…  
  
A door slid open into a slot that was concealed by a wall, and the three Irkens walked in.  
  
"Sirs, the new coordination officer for the organic sweep has arrived." An escort said uneasily.  
  
"So what do we care?" Red said, facing a monitor overlooking the planet that was too be sweeped in the next few days.  
  
"Just send them to…" Purple, who was also looking at the monitor, turned around to look at the new recruit, but stopped his sentence short and turned Red around.  
  
"Hey what the…" Red protested, then looked at the coordination officer.  
  
It was a girl, she had light blue eyes and wore a navy blue shirt with the Irken symbol on it. She had a dark purple skirt with ice blue stocking like things over her legs. She had black boots and gloves and was…  
  
"Hey your tall!" Red exclaimed.  
  
Yeah she was tall. Almost as tall as the tallests, except…  
  
"But an inch shorter than us!" Purple said.  
  
...YES…I was going to say that!! Jeez…  
  
The Irken girl ignored their comments.  
  
"What is the deadline for the planet?" She asked.  
  
"How come your tall??" Red asked back.  
  
The girl looked irriated.  
  
"Because I was born that way-what is the deadline?" She asked again.  
  
"What is your name?" Purple questioned.  
  
"Alva, now what is…"  
  
"How come we've never heard of you?" Red said before she could finish asking the question again.  
  
Alva shrugged.  
  
"Is there anything else you would like to know before I ask anything?" She said.  
  
"Um…" Purple rubbed his chin, "no-"  
  
"Are you single?" Red asked suddenly.  
  
Purple looked at him.  
  
"What kind of question is that??" Purple yelled.  
  
"My question!" Red shouted.  
  
"That's a stupid question!"  
  
"Oh yeah?"  
  
The Tallests started pushing each other as the escorts and Alva watched.  
  
Alva left after a few moments and the escorts soon followed.  
  
"Hey you scared her away!" Red said.  
  
"No it was you!" Purple accused, "why the heck would you ask something like that anyway??"  
  
"Because how many girls do YOU know that are tall??"  
  
Purple thought a moment.  
  
"I was gonna ask that!" He said.  
  
"No you weren't!"  
  
"I was too you just interrupted me!"  
  
"Liar."  
  
The fighting continued…  
  
  
  
Don't worry, they drive her insane in the end…oops I mean…augh…oh well. Please R&R…flames are expected! 0.o 


	2. Gift Planet

Author's Note: Hey I didn't get any flames..yet 0.o Thank you all! ^_^  
  
Disclaimer: I DON'T OWN INVADER ZIM AND IF YOU THINK I DO YOU'RE SERIOUSLY MESSED UP!! That is all.  
  
Tall Meets Tall  
  
Chapter Two: Gift Planet  
  
Alva pressed a few buttons on the console she was sitting in front of.  
  
Her job was to organize the ships to make an even sweep of the entire planet. Rid it of all it's life forms. This was no easy task for large planets, but this one wasn't too big and wouldn't take very long to do.  
  
The interactive screen let her only touch the places where the ships were to be plotted, and it automatically saved that location. She was re- arranging them around like a jigsaw puzzle.  
  
The Almighty Tallests came in the control center, to check on the progress.  
  
"How long will it take to sweep the planet?" Purple asked.  
  
"I don't know…the report of the terrain hasn't come back yet. Wasn't the invader of the planet supposed to do that before conquering it?" Alva said.  
  
Red was sucking on an Brainfreezy(an Irken Brainfreezy ^_~).  
  
"Erm, yeah…" he mumbled, getting a brain freeze.  
  
"Well I won't know until I know how many canyons and caves and such exist on it." Alva told them.  
  
"Uh huh…" Red's eye twitched as the brain freeze started taking affect.  
  
"I guess I could take a look from here and make a rough guess…" Alva said, pressing some buttons. The screen zoomed in on the planet.  
  
It was fairly flat. It had valleys and plains, with loads of beautiful scenery.  
  
"It's a shame all this is going to be destroyed." Alva said.  
  
"Why?" Purple asked, looking at Red, who was shivering from the cold in his head.  
  
"Well just look at! It seems so peaceful…" Alva turned around and looked at Red oddly, "what is wrong with him?"  
  
"I guess he ate his freezy too fast…" Purple suggested.  
  
"I'm…fine….just…fine…" Red mumbled.  
  
"Hmm…" Purple got an idea. He grabbed Red and floated off out of the control place thing with him.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
"Hey, Alva likes the planet." Purple told Red once back in their main…place 0.o  
  
"So?" Red replied, rubbing his head.  
  
"Well if you don't care I guess I can say it was all my idea, which it is anyway!" Purple crossed his arms.  
  
"All what is your IDEA?" Red said annoyed.  
  
"We haven't decided what to do with the planet yet, so why don't we give it to Alva?" Purple announced.  
  
"What? Are you crazy??"  
  
"It's better than asking if she's SINGLE!" Purple countered.  
  
"…fine." Red muttered.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
The Tallests came back into the control center Alva was in.  
  
"Okay you don't have to sweep the planet." Red said.  
  
"Huh?" Alva looked at him questioningly.  
  
"Well, if you think that it would be better off having all that…stuff on it so be it." Purple explained.  
  
Alva raised a brow.  
  
"You can have the planet," Red mumbled.  
  
"What do you mean I can HAVE it??" Alva asked surprised.  
  
"You like it you can have it!" Red yelled waving his arms.  
  
Purple looked at him irritantly.  
  
"It was my idea…" he said matter-of-factly.  
  
"What's your point?" Red said, looking at Purple.  
  
"You hated the idea!" Purple pointed at Red.  
  
Red gasped fakely.  
  
"I did not!" He replied.  
  
"Yes you did!" Purple accused.  
  
"I did not!"  
  
The "did not did too" thing started, resulting in Alva looking at them boredly, then leaving the room…again.  
  
  
  
I bet your wondering if this is going anywhere…well it is. Next chap will actually have something HAPPEN in it hehe…I mean…not THAT kind of happen…but the planet thing…oh just wait and see! 


	3. No More Gift...

Author's Note: This might be the last chap for a while for I am moving…ergh…my mom is complaining…  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own IZ okay? Jeez…  
  
Tall Meets Tall  
  
Chapter Three: No More Gift…  
  
"So what are we doing again?" Purple asked, waving that cotton candy like stuff to the side.  
  
"Simple, we are carving something into the planet for Alva." Red answered.  
  
"What, exactly?" Purple raised a brow (I know they don't have any but who cares!).  
  
"How about…her name?" Red suggested.  
  
"Isn't that a little…corny?" Purple said.  
  
"Girls like corny stuff!" Red concluded.  
  
"Are you sure about that?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Okay."  
  
The Tallests left for a room in the back of the Massive, which had a HUGE laser in it that could be controlled manually.  
  
Red told one of the workers there to go get Alva.  
  
Purple went over and aimed the laser at the planet.  
  
"You know for some reason I feel really stupid doing this…" Red commented.  
  
Alva walked in the room a few minutes later.  
  
"What is it, my Tallests?" She asked humbily.  
  
"In honor of the planet now being yours…we are going to imprint your name in the side of it!" Purple said.  
  
Alva stared at him.  
  
"What??" She exclaimed, "why??"  
  
"Because it's yours." Red said.  
  
Alva looked at them for a moment, not believing how utterly ridiculous this all was.  
  
"You really don't…" she began to protest, but a loud noise from the laser cannon cut her off.  
  
Purple was firing the laser into the planet, carving it out.  
  
Red suddenly tried to grab the laser control thing from him.  
  
"I wanna do it!" He yelled at Purple.  
  
"I got here first!" Purple defended.  
  
They started fighting over the controls and the laser shot all around the planet. The two Tallests got in a death match type stance and pushed on the laser from either end, making it stay in one place…  
  
Alva looked over at the fairly small planet, which had started smoking since the laser was knawing into it.  
  
Her eyes widened.  
  
"Everyone get the Massive out of here!" She yelled.  
  
Works started running around frantically and the ship slowly started heading in the opposite direction, when the planet blew up!  
  
Everyone was flown back including the ship, as well as all the little ships surrounding it.  
  
  
  
More soon if I can get to a computer…sometime in the next few days…0.o R&R! ^_^ 


	4. Invader Lem

Author's Note: Yay! Libraries are fantastic aren't they? I can post stuff! Yay! Did I already say that? Oh well I'll say it again, yay! This chap is longer…yay! And it gets kinda serious sorta. I wrote this around the same time as "When Comics and Cartoons Collide" so that is probably why. Oh well. Enjoy, and remember to R&R! ^_^ Oh and Topaz, if your reading this, email me the pictures at invader_briz@hotmail.com kay? Thanks! ^_^  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim, I do own Alva and Invader Lem however, aren't I spewing out fan-made characters quickly now? Yes I'd say I am. Oh well.  
  
Tall Meets Tall  
  
Chapter Four: Invader Lem  
  
"How are the repairs going?" Red asked a worker.  
  
"Er…okay I suppose…" The Irken said back, monitoring the repair job that was going on.  
  
A huge chunk of the planet had flown into the side of the Massive.  
  
"It's your fault you know…" Purple said, gliding up to Red, "if you would have just left me to do it that wouldn't have happened!"  
  
"It was MY idea I should be the one to carry it out!" Red countered.  
  
"Well it was my idea to give her the planet in the first place!"  
  
"Does it matter? The planet is gone now…thanks to YOU!"  
  
"Everything is MY fault isn't it!"  
  
"Probably," Red said smugly.  
  
"Hey!"  
  
Red looked around.  
  
"Where did Alva go?" He asked.  
  
"She went back to her quarters…" The worker said.  
  
"I bet she's mad at you for blowing up the planet!" Red accused.  
  
"What?? You blew it up just as much as I did!" Purple hissed.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Alva paced in her room; she stopped and looked out the window at the fragments of what was once a planet.  
  
Her eye twitched and she put her hand on her forehead, sighing heavily.  
  
"Why do I keep thinking this is my fault?" She asked herself out loud.  
  
"Your fault? What makes you think that?" An Irken stepped out of the shadows.  
  
Alva jumped back, startled.  
  
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY ROOM?" She screamed at the intruder.  
  
"I came to see who was getting the planet I worked so hard to enslave!" The Irken Invader snapped back.  
  
Alva stared at him quizzically.  
  
"It wasn't my idea you know," she said.  
  
"Of course it wasn't. Doesn't mean it makes it any more fair," The Invader told her, looking out the window at the shattered planet, "so what are you gonna do?"  
  
"What do you mean?" Alva asked.  
  
"You know stuff like this is just going to keep happening until you do something about it."  
  
"What could I possibly do about this??" Alva screamed in frustration.  
  
"Well, you could choose one." The Invader smirked.  
  
"Choose one? One what? What are you talking about?"  
  
"The Tallests! Why do you think they are acting all jealous of each other for anyway?" The Invader laughed.  
  
"Okay okay, before I continue this conversation any further would you please tell me your name or something?" Alva said.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry. How rude of me, I'm Invader Lem," Invader Lem saluted.  
  
"How come there where no reports on the terrain of the planet, Lem?" Alva asked.  
  
"Terrain reports? Er…" Lem stuttered.  
  
"Never mind, it doesn't matter now." Alva sighed.  
  
Invader Lem sighed in relief, and Alva looked at him suspiciously.  
  
"So, back to your problem…" Lem said quickly.  
  
"Why do you care?"  
  
"Well I would like to get off this ship before the Tallests blow it up fighting over you!" Lem yelled gesturing to her with both arms.  
  
"I didn't do anything…" Alva said quietly, blushing slightly.  
  
"What is wrong with you? Why is it you always must have DONE something? All you had to do to get their attention was to be a beautiful, tall, female okay??"  
  
Alva stared at him and blushed more.  
  
Lem's eyes widened, and he looked away and coughed.  
  
"Er, something like that anyway," he said.  
  
The door to Alva's room opened, and the Tallests came in.  
  
"Alva we are very sorry about," Purple looked over at Lem, "what are YOU doing here?"  
  
"Yes, go away," Red picked up Lem by the head and threw him out the door, where a loud crash was heard.  
  
Alva stared out the open door and Purple quickly closed it.  
  
"He'll be fine!" Purple announced quickly.  
  
Alva got that bored look on her face and sat down in a chair like thingy.  
  
"What were you saying now?" she asked irritantly.  
  
"Oh yeah, we're sorry about the planet." Red said.  
  
"Don't tell me sorry, tell the Invader of the planet, that you just threw out the door, sorry." Alva pointed to the door and the Tallests looked back at it.  
  
"He'll get over it!" Purple said.  
  
Alva groaned.  
  
"You really don't have to be sorry, what would I do with a planet anyway?" Alva picked up a writing device and started writing on the panel.  
  
"Hm, good point." Red rubbed his chin.  
  
"So your not mad about it?" Purple asked.  
  
Alva stopped writing and looked at him.  
  
"Mad isn't the word," she said, then continued writing.  
  
"Well what is the word?" Red peeked over at whatever she was writing.  
  
"Hm, disappointment, guilt, I dunno." Alva looked back at Red without moving her head.  
  
Red and Purple looked at each other.  
  
"Okay!" They said in unison.  
  
"So whatcha writing then?" Red asked, pointing at the panel.  
  
"Nothing," Alva said.  
  
"Can I see?" Purple grabbed it out of her hand.  
  
"Hey waitaminute!" Alva tried to grab it back but missed.  
  
"I want to see!" Red also tried to grab it from Purple, he grabbed it, but Purple wouldn't let go which resulted in a tug of war.  
  
"Gimme!" Red ordered.  
  
"No, I got it first!"  
  
"It's MY panel!" Alva protested.  
  
"I wanna see it!" Red cried.  
  
"Not before I do!" Purple jerked on it.  
  
Alva watched helplessly as the panel ripped in half and sparks went everywhere. Red flew into one wall and Purple in the other.  
  
They each looked at their halves and then at Alva.  
  
"Oops," they said.  
  
Alva didn't say anything, and walked out of the room, ready to explode. They watched her leave.  
  
Lem saw her walking away when she got outside her quarters, and asked if she was okay. Alva turned around all demonic like and kicked him down the hall.  
  
"IT TOOK ME TWO YEARS TO WRITE THAT NOVEL, IT WAS SAVED ON THAT PANEL, AND NOW IT'S GONE!!" Alva screamed, turning back around and walking away.  
  
  
  
I rather like Alva, discovering her personality. I now know she doesn't like to be blamed for things, and has serious guilt problems...something in her past maybe? I don't know…I drew a piccy of her too, actually three ^_^ two are at roomwithamoose.com in the Your Mom's Invader Zim Discussion forum. Under Fanart, then "Fanart…" She's a ways down there if you really wanna see what she looks like. I would post the link for you to copy and paste if I had instant access to the internet but I don't so you'll have to search for it for now if you really care 0.o Maybe by next chapter I can post the link in my profile or something ~_~ Oh and I don't know WHERE I was going with the Terrain Reports thing, I really don't know what Lem was freaking out over 0.o Please R&R! And go read "When Comics and Cartoons Collide" please! It's new, one of the many fics that I have in my mind while I'm Zim deprived and JTHM flourished. Yay! 


	5. Someone Else?

Author's Notes: Yay! I say that way too much…anyway, I have the next chapter, and I think this one is my favorite. Alva's personality is showing up a bit more, and Lem is…getting himself into something he doesn't really want to be in 0.o I might as well draw a picture of him too, I suppose. He's beginning to be a main character and I don't want him to! Oh well. It's hard for me to laugh at my own fics, so, since I laughed at this one, I hope you all think it's funny too! ^_^  
  
Disclaimer: I am here to disclaim ownership of anything Invader Zim except for Alva and Lem which I made up myself….how was that? Was that okay?  
  
Tall Meets Tall  
  
Chapter Five: Someone Else?  
  
Alva sat down in the food court and sucked on a drink (as in, there was a straw). One of her eyes twitched madly. She couldn't remember ever being so upset. If anyone so much as looked at her right then, they would have been begging for mercy, for she would have them in a chokehold in a split second. Basically, she wasn't exactly one to be messed with when upset.  
  
After a few minutes, she started to calm down.  
  
"Soooo…" Lem said, sitting down by her, "bad day huh?"  
  
Alva slowly turned her head toward him.  
  
"I really hope that wasn't supposed to be funny," she said simply.  
  
"…Not if you don't want it to be." Lem thought a moment.  
  
"Like I said, stuff like that is just gonna keep happening unless you…" he started to say, but was cut off when Alva grabbed him by the throat.  
  
"I choose…neither!" She hissed, then dropped him and sucked on her drink again.  
  
Lem felt his throat, and looked up at Alva fearfully.  
  
"That's nice, but, I just hope that they will listen to you when you tell them that," Lem said, rubbing his neck.  
  
"Tell them? I'm not telling them anything," Alva said, looking at Lem, "I don't ever want to see either of them again!"  
  
"Well how do you expect them to find out??" Lem asked.  
  
Alva stared at him.  
  
"Oh no, I'm not telling them, no way!" Lem got up and backed away, "I'm not telling them!"  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
"So Alva wanted me to tell you," Lem looked up regretfully at the Tallests.  
  
"Well? Tell us what?" Red said impatiently.  
  
"That she never wants to see either of you as long as she lives!" Lem announced quickly and with a little too much feeling.  
  
Red and Purple looked at each other in a confused fashion.  
  
"She hates you both now!" Lem continued.  
  
"There's someone else, isn't there??" Red said.  
  
"Huh? No…" Lem was confused also now.  
  
"It's YOU isn't it??" Purple pointed at Lem.  
  
"What??" Lem looked startled.  
  
"I can't believe it, one of our own invaders stabbed us in the back!" Red shouted to Purple.  
  
"Yeah! We should have known something was going on when we saw him in her room today!" Purple told Red.  
  
"What the? You got it all wrong!" Lem yelled.  
  
Red and Purple looked at Lem murderously.  
  
Lem took this time to run like the whole armada was after him.  
  
"Guards! Get him!" Red ordered.  
  
Two Irken guards grabbed Lem up at the door.  
  
"Thought you could get away with it huh?" Red said to Lem.  
  
"Alva doesn't like me! I don't think…" Lem looked up thoughtfully, "I mean..!"  
  
"Okay buddy, that's it!" Purple yelled angrily.  
  
"You're, er…going to go…um, somewhere really bad!" Red threatened.  
  
"Ask her yourself! She doesn't like me!" Lem pleaded.  
  
"Then why does she all of a sudden not want to see us anymore?" Purple asked.  
  
"BECAUSE YOU ERASED HER NOVEL!" Lem screamed.  
  
"Oh yeah," Red said rather air-headed like.  
  
Lem sighed.  
  
"Alright then," Purple waved for the guards to drop Lem, and they did so rather harshly.  
  
Lem got to his feet.  
  
"She would have told you herself but, she said she didn't want to ever see you again as I said earlier, so she made me do it." Lem informed.  
  
"Right sure," Red said, "we're keeping an eye on you invader LEM!"  
  
With that, Red and Purple floated off, leaving a very bewildered invader behind.  
  
  
  
R&R! That is all I have to say really. Just, R&R! ^_^ Oh and for a picture of Alva go to my profile I'll have the link there. 


	6. Um...I forgot...

Author's Notes: Hehe, I'm listening to Metallica. Anyway, I drew a picture of Lem, but I haven't scanned it yet. Also I won't be able to get to a computer in a few days, I might not be able to post this until after that. So why am I writing this? I have no idea...I guess if this doesn't come in a long time, that is why.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim, what you thought I did? Disclaimers seem so pointless...  
  
Tall Meets Tall  
  
Chapter uh...Six?: No Title for lack of creativity  
  
"So, did you tell them?" Alva asked.  
  
Lem nodded slowly.  
  
"What did they say?" Alva stared anticipantly.  
  
Now Lem knew he had to word this very carefully...  
  
"They think you like me! Now they're treating me like a fugitive or stowaway or something! You just had to make me tell them didn't you!" Lem spat.  
  
Alva looked at Lem in suprise.  
  
"Me like you? What makes them think that??" She asked, astounded.  
  
"I don't know! Um, you don't, right?"  
  
"No!"  
  
Lem's anteanne drooped a bit.  
  
"Okay, that's fine, just making sure." He said.  
  
"I'm not trying to insult you...I'm sorry I shouldn't have asked you to tell them. It's all my fault." Alva rubbed her forehead.  
  
Lem opened his mouth to say something, but before he could, he found himself being pushed off into a wall from the side.  
  
"So you hate us now??" Red yelled, but then was elbowed by Purple, "I mean, we're sorry."  
  
Lem sat up, rubbing his head.  
  
"I know we've been causing trouble for you ever since you got here but..." Purple started, then was smacked in the back of the head by Red, "I mean, WE know..." he corrected, giving Red the eye.  
  
Alva crossed her arms and walked off.  
  
The Tallests looked helplessly after her.  
  
"Way to go, now she probably hates us even more!" Purple turned to Red.  
  
"What did I do!" Red asked.  
  
"You...uh...you....blinked!"  
  
"Blinked?? So did you! What does that have to do with it anyway??"  
  
"HEY!" Lem walked to the Tallests.  
  
They looked at him.  
  
"Don't interupt us when we're arguing over senseless trivial things such as blinking in front of people!" Red ordered.  
  
Lem ignored him.  
  
"If I help you get back on Alva's good side..." Like they were on it to begin with...Lem thought, "will you stop harrassing me??" Lem asked.  
  
Red and Purple looked at each other.  
  
"Uh, sure why not," Purple said.  
  
"How do you think you're going to do that?" Red asked skeptically.  
  
"I have no idea...but I'll think of something!" Lem ran off.  
  
I know this was a super short chapter but oh well what am I gonna do? Don't say 'write longer chapters' either! Boo! I'm being flooded with new ideas for other stuff and, well that's just it. And since I haven't updated this story in a while I decided to put up what I had so far.  
  
Next Chap: Will Lem convince the Alva to forgive the Tallests? I don't know... 


	7. A Plan

Author's Notes: I noticed that unless the tallests are in it, this isn't even very funny. Oh well. I hope you like this chapter...or something...and review!!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim, I just own Alva and Lem.  
  
Tall Meets Tall  
  
Chapter Seven: A Plan  
  
Lem knocked on the "door" to Alva's room. He hoped she would be there. He had come up with a perfect plan...a plan that...  
  
The door shoved back, and Alva stood in front of it.  
  
"What do you want?" She asked.  
  
"I want to talk to you about the Tallests..." Lem said.  
  
The door suddenly flung back into it's original place.  
  
"Come'on! I'm serious, you won't be disappointed!! Hear me out!" Lem yelled.  
  
"Go away!" Alva sounded after a few seconds.  
  
"I'm not leaving until you open this door and listen to what I have to say!" Lem screamed defiantly.  
  
Irkens that had been passing by stopped and looked at him.  
  
"WHAT?!" He yelled at them.  
  
They continued on their buisness.  
  
The door slid back open.  
  
"Get in here and stop making a fool of yourself." Alva said, from somewhere in the room, she wasn't at the doorway.  
  
Lem walked in, the door closed behind him. He looked around and saw Alva sitting in a chair like thing, curled up to be more precise, writing in a new panel.  
  
"What could you possibly want to discuss about the Tallests?" She asked, not looking up.  
  
Lem smiled.  
  
"You see, I have a plan, to get them out of your antenna for good!" Lem said, sitting in a chair next to hers.  
  
Alva looked up.  
  
"How's that?" She asked, intruiged.  
  
"We make them think you dead," He said.  
  
Alva stared at him.  
  
"We can fake your death...or...to really get back at them, make them think you forgive them, then set it up so they think that THEY killed you, on accident of course." Lem got a devilish looking grin, Alva wasn't accustomed to seeing such a look on his face, or hearing such words. He was quite an evil little Irken, it seemed.  
  
"You would do that to the Tallests?" Alva asked suspiciously.  
  
"I really don't care. They are mumbling fools, maybe some grief would set them strait. And you do want to get them back, don't you?"  
  
Alva looked away.  
  
"Yes, but that would be a very sinister thing to do...how would we pull it off anyway?" She said.  
  
"I know how, but, I'm only telling you if you agree to do it." Lem said, "the Tallests think that I am here to try to convince you to forgive them, and, if it goes right, you will. But then you die, and they will be the ones to have caused it."  
  
Alva stared at him.  
  
"Alright, I'll do it."  
  
OH NO! Is Lem really so evil?! Maybe! YES! Actually, what will happen,(Zim like)and what IS this plan? HEHE! REVIEW! 


	8. The End

Author's Notes: OH YES! This is the last chapter(you all sigh in relief). Yeah I know, the previous two blunders(a.k.a. chapters) were quite boring. Yeah, I know. I hope this one is okay though. And even though I did leave room for more, I'm not gonna unless you all want more. Which you probably won't.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own invader zim and such...blah blah.  
  
Tall Meets Tall  
  
Chapter...Eight?: The End  
  
Alva and Lem stood at the entrance to the docking bay of the Massive. The Almighty Tallests were inside, arguing with an Irken officer about something.  
  
Alva peeked around the corner, then quickly hid herself again. Lem handed her a strange object and she put it in her mouth.  
  
"I'm not sure I can do this..." she said uneasily, "and this thing hurts my tongue!"  
  
"Sure you can, and that thing is going to save your life!" Lem pushed Alva into the docking bay, rather harshly, and in front of the Tallests.  
  
They stopped arguing with the other Irken immideatly and turned their attention to her.  
  
"I..um," Alva stuttered, "I came to say that I forgive you. Even though you RUINED my novel, BLEW UP a planet, and almost KILLED everyone aboard the Massive, I understand it was out of some, childish affection for me, and am deeply flattered." She said, her face telling she thought otherwise.  
  
Purple stared at Lem, who was smiling quite trumphantly.  
  
"Nice to see you've come to your senses," Red said.  
  
"Uh huh, yeah...have a banana!!" Alva suddenly thrust a banana toward the Tallests.  
  
They stared at it, then each other, then back at the banana.  
  
"Thanks!" They said in unison, then both reached for the banana. This sparked a tug of war.  
  
"HEY! IT'S MY BANANA!" Purple screamed, pulling on one end.  
  
"NO NO! IT WAS CLOSER TO ME! SHE OBVIOUSLY MEANT IT FOR ME!" Red screamed back, pulling his end harder.  
  
"LEGGO!"  
  
"YOU LEGGO!"  
  
The poor banana was jerked back and forth until if finally exploded, the goo splattering all over Alva's face.  
  
"AUGH! My eyes! I can't see!" She yelled, despratly clawing at the goo in her eyes. She stumbled around the room until she found a switch, and pulled it. A window thing opened, and she was sucked out into space, screaming. The hole promply closed up.  
  
The Tallests calmly glided to the window and looked out at the poor, screaming Alva, tumbling through space.  
  
Lem walked up beside them.  
  
"You KILLED her." He said, quite calmly.  
  
Suddenly, a voot-cruiser came speeding by, hit Alva, and kept going, with her stuck on the windshield.  
  
"Oh My Ansestry! You REALLY killed her!!" Lem screamed.  
  
The Tallests blinked a couple times.  
  
"I just noticed something," Purple said.  
  
"What's that?" Red asked.  
  
"We've RUINED Alva's novel, BLEW UP a planet, and almost KILLED the entire population on the Massive, just because of a childish affection for Alva..."  
  
"You JUST noticed that?" Red said, irritated.  
  
"And, now it all over. I promise never to fight over anything so carelessly again!"  
  
"Alright, me too."  
  
The Tallests smiled at each other.  
  
"Wanna go eat something?" Red asked.  
  
"Sure."  
  
With that, the Tallests glided off.  
  
"NO...no...the Tallests didn't kill her...I did...I did..." Lem was curled up in a ball in the corner, a crowd of Irkens had surrounded him. He looked rather feverish.  
  
A couple of uniformed Irkens strolled though and tied Lem up in a straght jacket.  
  
"I DID IT!!! IT WAS MEEEE!!!" Lem screamed as they hauled him off.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Alva was seated in a voot-cruiser, alongside another Irken. She spat out a wierd looking device.  
  
"That thing really hurt my tongue..." she said, "thanks, I really hated doing that, but I can't stand this, I don't want ANYONE...save you...to know I'm alive."  
  
The Irken grumbled.  
  
"Oh be quiet, you owed me, Zim"  
  
Zim shook his head at a memory.  
  
"Where do you want me to take you now?" He said, quite aggitated.  
  
"What about the planet your invading? Um, Earth? Maybe I can stay there, you know, fit in with the inhabitants..." Alva suggested.  
  
"NEVER!"  
  
"Come on Zim! I won't be in you way, I promise...I'll just pretend to be a Earth...thing!" Alva pleaded.  
  
"...I suppose...but if comprimise my mission, then I'm handing you over to the Tallests! Your lucky I came all the way out here, just to pick you up!" Zim yelled.  
  
"I can always..."  
  
"NO!! I said okay! Just shutup about it!"  
  
Alva smirked to herself. She decided she would work on her novel on Earth, where there would be no distractions, hopfully. She had Zim blackmailed pretty well, so he wouldn't tell anyone of her whereabouts. Things would be looking up from here, or so she thought.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
"Sorry," an Irken said, "there's only one nacho left."  
  
The Tallests stared at the single chip, sitting on a plate on a table on the planet Food Courtopia.  
  
"IT'S MINE!" Red screamed, lunging for it.  
  
"NO YOU DON'T!" Purple lunged for it also.  
  
They both grabbed it at the same time and another tug-of-war started.  
  
"GIMME THE CHIP! YOU SELFISH..."  
  
"NO, IT'S MYYYY CHIP!"  
  
It contiued....  
  
THE END  
  
Please read and review! I'm glad this is finally over. I know that Irken's don't have bananas, but I don't care! It's MY fic! SO THERE! Hope you enjoyed! ^_^ Oh, and I know Zim may have been OOC.. 


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